Have You Seen This Movie?
By Maria Staack
If you consider yourself a cinephile, you’re probably familiar with the guilt that washes over you when you have to tell someone you’ve never seen the movie they’re talking about. For a while, I thought that feeling meant that I couldn’t truly call myself a cinephile, but I’ve come to realize that it means exactly the opposite. To be a cinephile, I just have to love movies. I love movies by watching them over and over again, taking in every beat until I can predict each line before the characters say them. Even when I know a movie by heart, another rewatch offers a new experience.
I have seen the movie Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging (2008, dir. Gurinder Chadha) more times than I can count. The film follows Georgia Nicholson, a 14-year-old British girl, as she struggles with very real teenage problems— self confidence, her first kiss, friendship and boys. Comparatively, I have never seen Goodfellas (1990, dir. Martin Scorsese), which falls at number 6 on Empire’s list of 100 greatest films, as voted by readers. Don’t get me wrong, I want to watch Goodfellas, but I find difficult moments in life more often warrant a return to the comfort of a flick about an insecure fourteen-year-old girl rather than taking on the unknown.
I remember watching Angus when it first premiered on Nickelodeon. And then watching it again when they showed it the next day. And the day after that. At the time, I was eight. I looked up to Georgia like an older sister. I hoped that one day I would experience what she had. I wanted to have slumber parties with my friends, agonize over boys and have my first kiss. Come middle school, Georgia became a peer rather than an older sister. I finally knew what it was like to be in her shoes; to my surprise, I found it rather disappointing.
Feelings of constant awkwardness and embarrassment did not match what I imagined for my adolescence. During these years, going back and watching Angus came as a source of comfort. Georgia’s jealousy at her best friend getting a boyfriend before her seemed familiar. I didn’t feel so alone. Flash forward to now, at 21, I still watch this movie at least once or twice a year. I still find comfort in Georgia’s insecurities as I continue growing into myself, but I also see how much I’ve changed since middle and high school. Georgia’s most embarrassing moments are more hilarious now than ever before because I understand her; I was her. Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging may not be hailed by film critics as one of the greatest movies ever made— it never even made its way into movie theaters— but its value, as a rewatchable film, greatly impacts my life.
As of June 2020, Netflix alone houses over 3,500 films. There is no possible way to watch all of those films, let alone the rest of the movies in existence. I feel guilty for not watching them because I want to watch them. I want every movie to be one I grow with and constantly contemplate, but few can fit in that role. I find returning to my favorite movies to find peace valuable, as I do learning about movies and myself in the process. My love of movies cannot— and should not— be quantified by how many movies I have seen, but how I treat each movie I watch. Cinephilia is about learning every inch of my favorite films. ◆